Why You Need to Avoid This Word at All Cost

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“We should get together sometime.”

It’s one of those things I found myself saying when I would run into someone I hadn’t seen for a while.

This particular time was at my niece’s wedding shower.

When you’re part of a large family like mine, it’s nearly impossible to have one-on-one conversations with everyone at a family event. There are just too many people!

On this particular occasion, I found myself standing in the buffet line behind my brother’s wife.

I had always wanted to get to know her a little better, but she wasn’t always able to come to family gatherings… and they live about an hour and a half away, so I can’t just drop in.

While we stood in line together, we talked about how exciting it was for her daughter to be getting married and everything that goes into planning a wedding.

She asked what I was up to and I told her about our new deck and how the garden was overflowing. And then I said those words… “We should get together sometime. You should come down for dinner.”

We both agreed we would make plans to do so when the wedding was over.

Does this sound familiar?

You’re at a conference and you’re thinking you should go up and introduce yourself to your favorite speaker.

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Kathy Giegel

When Kam Giegel was little, she would sit on a large rock by her back yard creek with pencil and paper, dreaming of being a writer. Since finding AWAI, she is seeing that dream come true loving the adventure writing articles, newsletters and copy brings.

12 Comments

  • Spot on. I can totally relate with this… Another phrase I use that has the “should” effect is “I’ll try”. It gives me an easy way out of committing to a line of action.

    But from now on, it’s “I want” and “I will” for me.

    Thanks Kathy.

  • The same goes for me. I am done with procrastination and I should do this and I should do that. No More!! It’s “I WANT” and I WlLL do this.

    Thank you. This is inspiring.
    Carol

  • Love this! “Should” can sometimes create a negative kind of pressure. My mind often finishes a “should” sentence with “but I don’t feel like it.” Especially as a freelancer building a business, it’s so critical for me to adjust mindset from more common ways of thinking. Thanks for all the little insights here!

    • My pleasure Sara. I hope to see how awesome your “want” will build your freelancer business. Onward and upward!

  • TY for the insight it is funny how just one word can change the direction and even the perceptions of what your intentions might or might not be.

    Thanks Kathy

    • Your so right Debra. Just think if we could pay attention to five words we say all the time and don’t realize how it guides our thinking. The outcome could be amazing. Good luck in all you do!

  • I think if I remember correctly that changing “should “ to “I want” is an example of going from the passive voice to the active voice. There are a lot of articles written on this subject, if you find you have a spare moment look it up. Could be very enlightening!

  • Thanks Kathy, I too am guilty of the dreaded…”I should”. I am hereby making a commitment to a mindset shift to…”I will!” and by painting this picture of positive action in my mind. I am confident, I’ll succeed.

    Thanks for this enlightening article…

    • You rock Emerson! Wipe that dreaded “I should” right out of your mindset. I have no doubt you’re on your way to reaching all your dreams. All the best!

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